May be i am the rebirth of an owl. 'Cause i like to stay awake late into the night. Be it during my exams in the past, spending time with my big sprawled family and having cuppa of teas at two in the morning, staying awake staring at nothing, being a mum, or take this...Saturday nights, i just can't find the purpose under the bed, behind the sofa, inside the wardrobes, tucked in the kitchen drawers to sleep early.
Previous night when i finally hit my bed, it was a bit late. i was sleeping with my kid in his room. He doesn't want to sleep alone. He was asleep but i stayed awake, religiously justifying the owl's duty. Since not every night is a reading night, i relieved my Kindle from its duty. Instead, i kept starin at the ceiling until an idea hit me! i got up and switched off the light first. Not satisfied. i got up again and closed the room door half way. Still not enough. Finally when i shut the door completely and was lain back on the bed in the dark then only it worked.
Who says darkness cannot give birth to light? Who says nothing can be seen in the dark? Because i was staring at those little stars and moons and planets stuck on the ceiling. Put the radium object or those ones that glow in the dark (i am forgetting the term) and the darkness will pave way for some light...for some illumination. Just like the night sky who allows the real moon and stars to shine so bright at its dispense. See! Darkness is beautiful. Darkness has a meaning. It is not entirely meaningless.
i have always wanted to sleep under the sheet of starry sky but because of the night's creepy army, i can never do so. But my wish was unexpectedly completed last night. The ceiling was my make shift sky and those radium stickers were my moon and stars. But i was the real gazer. This all may sound very simple to you but don't they say there is a beauty in simplicity? Pin those radium stickers on your room ceiling, stare at them at night and then tell me whether it worked as a magic or not. It does. You won't be able to help yourself but smile at the sight. I liked it.
That simple sight made the end of my day. i kept staring until my eyes started to bat with sleep. You wonder how would you do it but somehow at the end, you always discover a coping mechanism. Like writing this post tonoght. You also realize that the next day may be a bigger challenge yet you stay and try and discover. We are all human being. And human being is basically and largely about survival. You fight, you lose, you get up, you fight again, and you keep losing and getting up and repeating the same Opera over and over until there is either nothing left in your existence to do it one more time or the battle has ended. i used the word 'Opera' here 'cause it's your battle. Not everyone is capable of understanding it. You can't explain it neither you intend to do it. You just go on staring at the ceiling at those fake stars and moons and planets and find something to smile upon. Because now you know that there is always a light in the abundance of darkness.
Now it's this screen tonight that's makin' my eyes tired. i better go to sleep now.