Wednesday, 26 February 2014

Helicopter moms? A Big No No

Helicopter moms are those mothers who constantly push their children to the edge of being super-kids. It means, such mothers prefer to perfect the art of perfecting their kids by enrolling them for several classes like dance, sports, vocals, etc. after their school hours, just to make them better than the other kids. These mothers think they are doing a high favor to their children while their good intention turns into bad consequences in sometime and unfortunately, they remain unaware of it.

Helicopter parents...hovering over the kid 24x7
                     
When a kid is constantly drilled to do something that exceeds his or her limits, not only mental but physical problems starts as well at the end. Headache, stomach pain, anxiety, stress are few results of being pushed over the edge. Such moms should not breathe down to thier kid's neck as it is harmful for them.

Solutions: Helicopter moms MUST learn that trying to live their dreams through their kids is not recommended. Hence, try these solutions...

  • Give some space to your kid. Talk about his interests.
  • Learn to relax. Living in the constant stress of molding your kid into something that he is not, leaves you nowhere around your kid's trust. He will stop befriending you.
  • Remember, loading your kid to re-live your incomplete dreams is a very bad idea and clinically not recommended either. What you got to do in your life is your share but your kid's life is his'. Let him live the way he wants it under your careful (not over-indulgent) supervision.
  • Life is long. Enroll him in one class at a time so that he can give his 100% attendance and concentration. This way, he will achieve the maximum results, exactly the way you wanted it.
  • Give your kid a break every once in a while. While classes keep them away from TV, computers and laziness, let them enjoy these gadgets too for some time. Digital exposure also helps in their growth and development, provided it is being watched wisely.
  • Activity classes keep your kid away from boredom plus gives him a productive time slot. Choose carefully when you pick such classes. Narrow down on your kid's interests, distance form your home, the everyday convenience, charges, other facilities etc. Just because Karate classes are nearby to your home, do not pick it impulsively. Your kid may dislike you for that. 
  • It is essential to keep an eye on the duration of the classes. After schooling hours, kids get tired and they do not want to spend so much of time doing another hour long activity. 
  • If you have learnt something that can be taught to the children, think of organizing a workshop at your home. This way, your kid will get to stay at home without making a fuss, can enjoy other kids' company and will learn something meaningful. This will also get you closer to him.
  • At last, do not act to be tagged as Helicopter Mom. Rather, work on to be called as The Best Mom ever. 
Good Luck!

Monday, 24 February 2014

Night when I had a good night sleep

If you are a regular reader of my blog, you would be knowing it has become a bit struggle for me to get a good night sleep. But I had a very sound peaceful dose of whole night snooze this weekend.

On last Friday's night when we all three came to bed for sleeping, I started a game. I told Sumit and Ashmit that each one of us would ask a funny question to one another and the answer must be funny in the same context.

To start the game up, I asked to my son.

"Ashmit! Why are you a boy?"

Thinking a bit, he soon came out with almost an instant reply.

"Because I am born as one"

We were quite impressed by his intellectual answer. Then the game went on with some funny notes. I remember when it came to Ashmit's turn to question his father, he had asked,

"Papa! Why did you born on 15th August? Why on Independence day?"

Sumit's official birthday indeed is celebrated on August 15th every year while his real birthday falls on August 20th. At the moment, Sumit could not come up with a some funny answer though the impromptu game I invented was a fun to play.

We laughed, then proceeded to play Word Puzzles in my mobile, and then went to sleep happily. After a long time, I slept like a baby...deep in sleep and free of my work pressure.

I guess laughing and spending time with your family right before the time phase that stresses you, can lead to happen miracles to your life style. I can surely avail such fun filled times during weekends because I mostly work on my projects at nights. Thus, I have got one more prominent reason to look towards the weekends.


Wednesday, 19 February 2014

Love your work and it will love you back

Life has become altogether so busy that I do not find a moment to breathe. Just today I worked on my laptop for continuous four and a half hours. And when I started getting a headache, I stopped after finishing my work. I took a break. I was very exhausted by the time I shut my lappy down.

But it's cool. It feels really good to be too busy to look around; too busy to notice anything. It gives me no time to ponder over creepy unwanted issues of life. I work like a happy-go-lucky soul who loves her work intensely. Interesting thing is, I get headache from writing and writing is my only solution. So after tea-time break, I again landed in front of my lappy to work. I again sorted out important mails and sent out articles, fixed some activities, went through reservations, scheduled some discussions and that's it. My headache almost gone.

Now when I get to be busy this much, I realize how quintessential it is to keep doing something in life; something that you totally love and mad for. When the motivation comes from within, you automatically get the energy to go through all the hurdles, cross every barrier and reach out to your dream destination. It is so right to say,

"It's so hard when I have to, and so easy when I want to."

Above saying is so right. When you want to get somewhere, you will find a way anyhow and the journey will be enjoyable but if you find the destination burdening, the journey towards it will become hard and tiring. By the time you reach to the goal, your most of the energy would have passed out from the body. So do things that you love. Find work that can bind you with heart. Enjoy being busy like I do. Because when you love your work, it will love you back.

Now I am going to do my work...to write. See you in my next post.

Tuesday, 18 February 2014

Rainbow of life

I know it has gone late at night and I am working on my computer but I feel like writing and sharing my immediate thoughts with my blog and being a writer and a blogger, how can I do injustice with my writer self? I can not and I will not :)

It's Monday (very soon turning into Tuesday in a few minutes) and the day was okay. Last weekend was very horrible to me as I have got a severe throat infection that resulted in high temperature and an absolute impossibility of swallowing things. On Saturday night, we had some friends over for the dinner and spent a great evening nevertheless I was feeling not well since the morning. I thought having some fun and laughter sharing would do the magic and keep me on healthy track but somehow I had to pop a tablet right before serving the dinner. As the night gradually crept under the sheath of darkness, my situation started to deteriorate and finally I ended up with really serious problems that I have mentioned above. Could not sleep at night. Sumit did his best to keep the situation under control but unfortunately it was not exactly into his hands. Then we went to the doctor in the morning and got some medication.

It was Sunday and throughout the day, he took care of me. The kitchen was a mess after Saturday's dinner and I didn't have enough strength to step inside it. So he did his best and helped me in getting rest the entire day. Our neighbors are so good that they provided us their home-made lunch. This way, Sumit did not have to think much about the mid day meal. We are so thankful to be around with such nice and wonderful neighbors. Their one thoughtful gesture has melted my heart.

Today (Monday) Sumit didn't allow me to wake up in the morning and prepare breakfast and lunch for our son. He did it all by himself and that touched me a lot. Really! Sometimes I think how lucky I am to get such a loving and supportive husband. He made both the courses and helped Ashmit to get ready. I too woke up and helped him along with few things as being a mother, I knew all the things that require for a school-going kid to get him set up for the school.

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

A simple compliment lasts for a lifetime!!

Valentine's day is upcoming and people all over the world are busy in celebrating it. Lovers to be precisely. But is the day really meant to be celebrated by lovers? If you broaden up your vision and scale up the thoughts on a higher level, the day can be celebrated with anyone and for anyone who you love and care about. 

This morning my mother Whatsapped me this pretty heart-touching message -

What is love?

Love is when my mom kisses me and says, 'My child is the best of all' and dad says, 'Sorry my child! Got very late today'.

Love is when your brother says, 'You don't worry my friend! I am there for you'.

Love is when your mood is off limits and your sister says, 'Let's go walk around'.

Love is when your best friend hugs you and says, 'Oye! Where were you yaar? It wasn't fun without you''

These are all the best moments of love. Don't miss them in life. Love is not only having a girlfriend or a boyfriend. It is all about those people who are there for you..always.

Happy Valentine Month.



Complimenting is a good gesture

Isn't the message lovely and makes sense in every possible way? Why to plan everything only for your lover if you share your heart with friends and family members too!!! So this Valentine, not only to the person you go banana over, compliment those people also who are an immense and inseparable parts of your life. One person can not make your life altogether wondrous. It usually takes a bunch and the bunch does include your friends and family.

Sunday, 9 February 2014

It all begins with a crack... My guest post

Recently I wrote a Guest post for b00kr3vi3ws... Find it HERE

                                                                            x------------------------x

Many a times, we get the power of motivation from within and then we start reaching out to the goals. But on the contrary, sometimes, we take a step forward and then we succumb to the strength that is required to make it to the goal.

And I am a better example of the latter. Becoming an author was something that I had never thought of...ever. I was happy and content in my life being a housewife and a mother on personal note and a Freelancer, and a Poet (sometimes I do poetry as well) on professional note. But when my husband Sumit suggested me to write a book, I was completely unsure. Because writing articles ranging from 200 words to 2000 words is a different thing and rather easier but writing a book with thousands of words skilfully weaved with fresh plot, suitable dialogues and intriguing scenes is a humongous task. So I was not convinced yet I chose to start my journey. I started writing my first ever book. Little did I know at that time that one day, this lack of confidence in myself would be turned into a pompous amount of strength and happiness. When I saw my book for the first time, the confidence that I never had was now all over me. I was awash as well as totally consumed by it. After only few months of writing my book, I also started my blog, titled as Pages From My Life on Blogspot portal and now, Blogger has become another added identity.

Now I am just not happy but happier and more content. Seeing my book in my and lots of other people's hands has encouraged me. There is no stopping, no look back now. I am sure as hell confident to write more and more interesting books.



Recently I had gone to see one of my neighborhood friend. Don't know how our funny lighter discussion swiftly slid to career choice/s. I asked her pick concerning her career but she said she does not know and is afraid to take a step because of it. Then I told her one thing about me for which I have no qualms sharing with you here as well. I told her about my first and recent book launch which she with her family had attended too. I told her that -

Friday, 7 February 2014

In the middle of frenzy, comes a savior

Today is Friday. Unarguably the most favorite day of millions!! It is mine too. Even though I don't go to any office (I work from home :)), it is still the most exciting day of the week because...next two days I get to spend with my husband, Sumit. Two wholesome days that sure are healthy for us.

So to make this Friday special, we have planned something special. Why this Friday? Nothing specific you dear. It is just...every Friday is special but the cool idea of masquerading it into something special hit the nails on my head just two days ago. So that is why we are having a special Friday night...tonight.

We have planned to have a night out. We will watch movie/s that we both have been longing to see, will have some finger foods, and a beverage (he may opt for wine but my preference will always zero in to Thumbs Up). A total absolute off from our respective works. I am very excited about it as it has been really long since we have watched movie or spent time together and that too with no hindrance. Usually he is busy in his office work and I am with my writing. He is coming late these days and after dinner, we get little time to talk to each other. Sumit is tired albeit he helps me with some of the chores. I feel bad for him for how much our husbands have to work to make both ends meet. They do work a lot!! Beyond our imaginations.

Since last few nights, I have been writing till late night. I often write till 2.30 or 3 AM and then go back to bed. Mornings are usually drowsy. I hurriedly finish my morning errands and send our kid to school. It is then only when Sumit leaves for his office I get few hours for myself. Alone, private, secluded time and I strongly love it like my Nescafe Red Mug (I got recently). But even in those free hours, I am busy with the promotion of my book to death. Sending emails, reaching out to people, answering every mail and call, thinking more and more about it, then working on my next project, everything takes me down to tiredness and in the midst of all this madness, my kid arrives often shouting like a mad. Then there is no time which I can actually use for my benefit. I sometime fall asleep in the evenings.

This way, both of our days are pompously stuffed. Such routines can be called frenzy; totally being caught in the whirlpool of the demands of life.

So it is time to call for a savior. Will celebrate this Friday night with each other. Will do our favorite things that we have missed to our busy schedules. :)


Thursday, 6 February 2014

Four core themes of It's Never Too Late ... A guest post

Recently, I have been asked and writing guest posts for some of the wonderful bloggers and website owners. This one I wrote for TheReaddicts. Hope you will like it :)


Love & Friendship

For me, love and friendship go hand in hand. A romantic relationship infused with friendship as its bridge is way stronger than any other bond in this world. It automatically grows the resilience between the two people connected to it. Love & friendship are one of the strongest core themes of my novel. Maya is only able to do better in Antaragni because of her divine friendship with Rajat. In later stages when she struggles through the horrible night, it is her love for the family that spins the table around. It has always been love and friendship for Rajat and her family that makes Maya pass through every pitfall, every difficulty.


Fear

We all face fear, in one or other form. It may be as tiny as a dot and as giant as a monster but fear is always present within us. Fighting to overcome its heart wrenching effect is a task that every one of us has to go through it. Exactly the same happens with Maya when she confounds her biggest fear – Fear of losing her family and dignity. But remember one thing always; a weakness gives birth to strength somewhere within. So when you face fear, realize that the strength to fight with it has also taken birth in you. You just need to find it much like Maya.



Introspection

 This, I believe, is something we all do on a normal basis but the analysis of wringing ourselves becomes self storming when you face doubts and umpteen times of self-restraints. The life after the night of terror, Maya too has to go through an endless conduit of introspection. She begins to have doubts in herself. She loses faith in herself at many points. The repercussions of the night churn her heart with several hounding memories. But she continues doing her best to keep all the pieces together and finally she makes her way out of the introspection, the self-analysis.



Faith

Faith is as diverse as human beings but here with faith I mean, faith in destiny. Have faith in destiny. No matter what circumstances you have to go through, always have in mind that destiny has stored something better for you. Many of you may dismiss it with utter disagreement but I don’t intend to argue at this point. This concept is hard to understand I know but you can trust it as it is coming straight from an author’s heart. I have already mentioned it in my book this way -
When every door is closed, there must be a window of opportunity and if that one is closed too, try to change the lock and get out.But remember, you struggle only because of one faith – the faith of finding something better for the survival outside the door frame.




Tuesday, 4 February 2014

Are we becoming digital slaves?

Or, we have already become. Isn't it?

Recently a little incident happened that careened my focus towards this point...again. Two nights ago, I and Sumit both were working on our laptops. Sumit, being tired and facing health issues since a little while, was not feeling well nonetheless he could not stay away from checking his Facebook account...over and over again. I told him to get some rest but he continued wandering over the site for no reasons, much like we all do. We have nothing to retrieve at social networking websites yet we are logged in through out the day and keep refreshing the page for unconcerned updates like the world would crash down if we don't procure them.

I shook my head at how much we all have become slaves of gadgets like mobile, laptop, watch, tablets and the list is long. Calls, text messages, email alerts, app notifications etc. instantly diverts our mind which is not so very good in many circumstances. Everyday something new is getting invented and gripping us in more, thicker shackles. It is good to improve technology wise but at what cost? Health? Family? Freedom? And if nothing else then privacy?

I am a writer and my profession demands screen exposure for most of the day time. Sometimes I too get irritated and sincerely want to log off from all the accounts, shut the laptop down and have some rest. If not rest then enjoying through some other refreshing way. But I can not and I am helpless about it. I am totally dependent on my laptop for my work and I can not imagine myself surviving without it. And this does not sound too good to me as well.

Earlier days were better I guess. We had pens and papers to write. I agree it consumed lots of efforts but at least we were not easily prone to mental and physical health issues. Also, working with natural things keeps you aware of our surroundings.

While technology has become inseparable part of our lives, we still insist on having must-to-follow excuses and reasons to stay away from it. Here I am giving away some tips to stay away from gadgets and if you too have something to share, feel free to do so in comment box. I will also get enriched with additional knowledge of bursting the bubble of digital world.


Captions say it all!!

Monday, 3 February 2014

Mondays are good head starts for the week

Monday...most of the occasions a daunting day. If not office then house and stuffs related to it make it so. So my this morning and most of the afternoon went into de-cluttering some parts of my house, my kid's toy almirah and my own wardrobe to be precise.

In fact, the day started on a bizarre note because of which I could not send my kid to his school. Therefore, he is right in front of me mimicking Captain America with his set of bow and arrow with fake whooshing and killing sound. Anyways, when Sumit left for his office, I got down to the business i.e. tidying up my kid's toy almirah. It has four giant racks and all of them were burdened with books and articles to death. Every rack was spilling out the moment someone opened the door. So I decided to clear up this mess first. After two hours of rummaging through piles of books, stacks of little-big toys and clutters of unwanted articles, I finally succeeded in resuscitating the almirah. It was tidied up and looked very happy with all arranged racks and things. I too was glad to see this. But the best thing that happened with me out of the mess was...I got the first rack completely empty for my books!! Yes. I got a big space for keeping lots of my current (and future) books and novels and magazines that I heavily dote on. People who carry their own libraries at their homes can only relate to my happiness successfully. I gave a huge smile and immediately ran to my another book shelf and oozed out some of the books (my this book shelf too is loaded with lots of books). I so needed a big space and when I got it, my happiness knew no boundaries.

I placed my books as well as children books on the opposite corners of the new born spacious rack so that there would be no fuss finding a gender wise book. I adjusted them very carefully and the outcome looks really nice. I am very glad to get such a nice gift of big rectangular space. When I locked the neatly arranged toy almirah, I had the feeling of triumph of finally getting loads of clutter out of my house. I also arranged my jewelry articles and bangles that took around half an hour of good effort.

Then there was rest of the house waiting for me to settle it. It took another hour to get everything back at their respective places. Finally I got everything settled and done. I was so much consumed in my work that when my kid said he was hungry, then only I got a reminder that I had forgotten to make Sambhar. Rice was already done but sambhar was yet to make. I hastily terminated my own work after finishing miniscule tasks and proceeded to make rest of the lunch. When I sat down, I realized I too was hungry as hell. When I brought out rice laden with sambhar over it, its aroma titillated my hunger pangs and the moment I put the first bite into my mouth, it felt like heaven. Nothing can beat a meal that is served to a hungry person. I and my kid both were eating, heavily indulged with its taste. It felt ridiculously good. I also had two Mango pickles that my mother had given during her recent visit. Those pickles enhanced the taste of rice-sambhar by manifolds.

But I realized one truth. Today (Monday) has been rather a productive day for me. I got so many unwanted things out of my home and also received a big space for my books. This is wonderful. We make Mondays notorious for no reasons. In fact, it gives you a good head start for the week. :)