Shaking your head dismissively at the title? But I won't stop myself for what I have to say. Not because I don't care but because I want you to understand ONE very important thing if you are a parent.
Yes! As a parent, we all should be little selfish towards our children. But take this *Selfish* word in a positive way because being selfish is always taken with negative connotations. Sometimes parents get so much involved in taking care of other arenas of life that they had to ignore or get failed to understand the needs of their own children. While such thing can be understood at some level, it is sometimes not acceptable even if the children are old enough to assess the reason/s behind it.
|Do the basic - Listen to your children|
Getting scold or being hit because of someone else's mistake creates a gap between the children and parents and if the situation is not taken care of carefully on time, this gap gets wider as the time passes by. Contrary to the fact that big children can take care of themselves, they still seek for their parent's attention; they want their parents to listen to their things.
Mistakes can be done by anyone as no one is infallible but when the mistakes are happening, children simply do not expect the parents to come and spill insulting or ill words to them. It hurts...always. Okay! Being at mistake makes you prone to some scolding but ignorance...is not at all the attitude that parents or elders should take into the account.
Parents sometimes also fall for others spitted words. They fail to analyse the fact that the reality may differ from what they are listening to right now. Instead of going be rude on the spot, rather opt to listen to your children's things on prima facie. Everything has its pros and cons. So definitely or may be , you may find something that you have missed while being in the conversation with the other person and who knows, that *missed part* turns out to be the central core of the whole miff.
So always listen to your children even if it demands to ignore others sometimes. Others will always take care of themselves first but your children!! They will always be there for you; to listen you; to take you to the places you want and to take care of you when you are on the sickbed. As a parent, your little attention might create the magic on the relationship you have with them. Your children might open up to you at some topics that you probably have never anticipated them to be. Your children will have the trust on you that whatever happens, you will be there to look after the issue being unbiased.
Big or small, children always thrive for love, care and attention from their parents. Childhood roots and nurtures these desires in them. However they have grown big yet...they will set their eyes at you in trouble and happy times or any time in the life. Even I still call my mother and discuss the menu when I am expecting some guests around. Although I am adept at it but yet, I feel a sigh of relief just at the mere thought of her being present at the other side of the phone to solve the issue or listen to my things.
So according to my advice (and if you willing to gulp it down your throat), be a little selfish towards your children. This will certainly tighten up the bond, strengthening the weak links in the process.