Tuesday, 19 February 2013

LOSS in an argument, deciphered

"Conversation is an exchange of knowledge, argument is an exchange of ignorance" -- Anonymous

Argument is a verbal cacophony that happens between two or more than two people. An argument is usually considered as an unpleasant experience where people throw their sticky opinions on one another desperately wanting those to get glued onto the walls and the window sills of other minds searching the ways for the acceptance. Long sentence...isn't it?

Let me paraphrase it then. When people unfairly want their words to get the acceptance during verbal fight, they fall into an unpleasant process coined as Argument. A discussion can be lively if it happens between like-minded people or beloveds.

A gem stone of conversation 

But the same lark can turn into an anathema if it falls on the laps of people who are chalk and cheese. Completely different personalities naturally bear different perspectives and a lack of understanding and respect for one another can easily turn an amusing discussion into a disastrous argument.

Whether you are right or wrong in any argument, it is utmost important to not to let oneself fall into any kind of such cataclysmic happenings. If you do, you loose and this LOSS can cost you higher later in terms of mental satisfaction and peace. Based on several life experiences (not solely of mine's only), I have designed a detailed sketch of LOSS which describes the four very essential and inevitable parts of an argument. If you loose these four elements, you are at great loss friend and trust me on that note.

L ~ Leverage :: That means the ability to control the situation or people around you. Everybody wants to nail the supreme leverage over the others. But when you are in a verbal fight, you loose this very much required element; you loose leverage over the others. Spitting out word by word without analyzing the situation, your mind slows down to observe and eventually fails to examine where the much-liked amusing discussion is heading to. 

Pause at many moments and let them pass. Speak less and listen more like Diogenes have stated beautifully ::

"The reason why God gave us two ears and one mouth is, so that we may listen more and talk less"

O ~ Opportunity/Observation :: When you put words more at work rather than mind, I bet you are at loss of many opportunities to end or abate a heating argument. A loss of one opportunity leads you to another downfall; hence few more minutes of hot molten lava (words) melting and resting on your ears. 

Another depict, is Observation. As I discussed in Leverage, observation is much like a tool that belongs to a skilled carpenter who knows where to fix a nail to fix the falling apart furniture. 

"It is impossible to interpret without observing, but not to observe without interpreting"


Mason Cooley

Observe others' thoughts and actions. Think in which aisle these issues are taking you down. If you think it's too much to take on or it's a frivolous attempt to continue, find the right sized nail (that means the opportunity) and fix your falling apart argument.


S ~ Serendipity :: This simply means valuable discoveries or things that fell into your kitty luck by chance. For running into a serendipity, you have to have a keenly observant mind. Observation makes you stand on the higher platform from where you can see how many are with you and how many have already taken the exit.

This exact view may give you the best shot of the decade. Discovering some hidden realizations under the sac of verbal outlook can make your life easier. A true friend whom you considered your right arm can secretly turn up with perfidy playing with undetectable irony pieces of words. All you have to do is, to keep a metal detector handy. 

"Serendipity. Look for something, find something else, and realize that what you've found is more suited to your needs than what you thought you were looking for."        

Lawrence Block


Realizations that struck with serendipity can be hurting too. Coat your heart with a burn resistant ointment before any argument is highly recommended. 

S ~ Stance :: Means your attitude towards anything. A perfect quote to say it all.

"Never rise to speak till you have something to say; and when you have said it, cease." 

Witherspoon

Always stand by your words. Fiddling with your words can cause you great harm at the end, surreptitiously declaring you as a light minded person who can not do the simplest task like deciphering his own thoughts. 

Above all the four fibers are a part of an inseparable thread of a conversation. If you hold Leverage, seeks for Opportunity/Observation, stumble upon the Serendipity and take your Stance, you are on the tip of gaining.

These four agents will make you the master of communication but a tip to keep in mind ~ muster them first ;). Then only you can squeeze maximum outcome of a conversation.

Lastly, a cherry on the cake quote ::

"A single conversation across the table with a wise man is better than ten years mere study of books."

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

















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